New Rogue One Trailer, Self-Help by L.G. Keltner, Rio Olympics, CassaStar Audio Book Winners, and News

Movie News

New Rogue One Trailer!

JoBlo posted this picture of Aquaman wielding a guitar on set for Justice League. Aquaman just got even cooler in my eyes!

Last week, Blastr confirmed – there will be a fourth Chronicles of Narnia film. Producers are in place and someone is working on the script of The Silver Chair. The first three films made $1.6 billion, so it’s about time they worked on finishing the series.

Self-Help by L.G. Keltner

Thanks for letting me stop by your blog, Alex! It’s great to be here!

Writing the Self-Help 101 series has been an enjoyable experience. The first novella Self-Help 101 or: How I Learned to Take Over the World Through Tolerating My Family takes place during Christmas. This latest novella Self-Help 101 or: How to Survive a Bombardment With Minimal Injury focuses on the 4th of July. The third novella is coming out late next month. The last one is in the planning stages, and I hope to have it out before the end of the year.

After writing these books, I thought it would be fun to share with you some books you can rest assured I will never sit down to write.

Self-Help 101 or: How to Do Your Taxes at the Last Minute (I’d be so out of my depth and bored trying to write such a thing I fear it would kill my love for writing.)

Self-Help 101 or: How to Say the Right Thing in Any Social Situation (I am such a socially awkward person that any advice I attempted to offer would be disastrous.)

Self-Help 101 or: How to Quit Drinking Caffeine With Minimal Human Suffering (I could not write such a book, nor could the main character Dani from this series. We’re both too dependent.)

Self-Help 101 or: How to Remain Calm When Someone Tells You Science Fiction is Stupid (I’ve had people tell me this before, and no, I wasn’t able to remain calm.)

What self-help book could you never write?

Find L.G. at her blog
Find Self-Help 101 or: How to Survive a Bombardment With Minimal Injury at Amazon, iTunes, Barnes and Noble, Smashwords, CreateSpace and Goodreads

Rio Olympics

We’ve been enjoying the Olympics this past week. Watching athletes who are the best of the best stretch to do even better is inspiring. I do the row machine at the gym, so watching the women race and the pace they set was just amazing. Track and field is in full swing now, with another week of awesome events. Some of the highlights for me this past week:

Michael Phelps has now won twenty-eight medals, twenty-three of them Gold. That is just mind-blowing. We'll never see another athlete like that in our time.

Swimmer Katie Ledecky – they say she is the greatest swimmer right now. The woman beat her own world record for the Gold in the women’s 800m freestyle, coming in ahead of the Silver medalist by twelve seconds. Twelve! Just think how great she’ll be in four years.

Our women’s gymnastic team obliterating the competition for the Gold. (They said their team score was the equivalent of a dozen touchdowns ahead.) Then Simone and Aly securing Gold and Silver in the individual all-around was icing on the cake. I still swear those girls have springs in their feet.

Women’s beach volleyball. Need I say more? (But I will, because it’s impressive that Kerri Walsh Jennings just might win her fourth Gold medal.)

Swimmer Simone Manuel winning a Gold and breaking the World Record, a historic moment. There are just so few African-American swimmers.

Our men’s team is struggling a bit, but our women’s basketball team is killing it and should sweep for the Gold. They also scored over a hundred points in their first three games, the first time any basketball team has done that at the Olympics.

Ninja News 

Pat Hatt had no book release last week. The writing community was shocked and Amazon’s stocks dropped. The Cat could not be reached for comment.
However – Pat has been doing a series poking fun and featuring his blogger buddies. And he got me last week, right down to my own blog post format. Visit Pat Hatt and prepare to be amused!

New Release-
Cruising for Murder by Elizabeth S. Craig
Find it on Amazon, iTunes, and Kobo

And the winners of a CassaStar audio book are…

Jess Haight @DMS Files

and

Bish Denham

Congratulations!

Excited for Rogue One? What about another Narnia movie? What self-help book couldn’t you write? And what highlights of the Olympic games have you enjoyed?

ID Resurgence Review, Paperback Writer, July Movie Preview, IWSG Anthology Contest Update, and Ninja News

Independence Day: Resurgence Movie Review

Director Roland Emmerich says he hates superhero movies because he finds them silly.
Dude, have you watched any of your own films lately?
I left my brain at the door and my intelligence was still insulted by this film.
Sure they went bigger, and it was fun if you could sit through the nonsense. Unfortunately, the stupid was too much for me.
This film failed on every science level and then some. Plausibility just went right out the window and there were tons of coincidences. This film demeans all other science fiction movies.
And what is it with Emmerich and stuff falling on planes? He must be a big fan of buildings attacking flying aircraft.
It was good to see Jeff Goldblum, Bill Pullman, Judd Hirsch, and the others return. They did their best with what they had.
This film wasn’t supposed to be more than a dumb popcorn movie. Sometimes, I’m all right with that. But it just blew it too often for me. And it wasn’t very memorable.
If you remove your entire head before entering the theater, you might enjoy it. You have been warned…

How the Beatles Made Me a Paperback Writer

By Sandra Ulbrich Almazan

It was twenty(one) years ago today
The Beatles’ Anthology began to play.
My tech writer job was out of style,
But they were guaranteed to make me smile.
So may I introduce to you
The group I’ve loved for all these years,
Gwen, Jenna, Ysabel, and Kay!

I was a casual Beatles fan until “Free as a Bird” was released as part of the TV Anthology series in 1995. The song stuck in my head and helped me get through my dreary work day.

I quickly devoured every Beatles song and book I could find. One book in particular (A Day in the Life: The Music and Artistry of the Beatles, by Mark Hertsgaard) struck me with the phrase “four-fold synergy” when describing how the Beatles worked together. I wanted to create another intimate group, but one of all women. They wouldn’t be musicians, but magicians. Their magic would be linked to the number four--but not the four elements. How about the seasons?

That was how I created the Season Avatars: Gwen, a healer/touch telepath (Spring); Jenna, plant magic (Summer); Ysabel, animal magic (Fall); and Kay, weather magic (Winter). Each Avatar is inspired by one of the Beatles. I wrote a 170,000 word novel about the Avatars and submitted it to publishers, but even after reducing the word count I received nothing but rejections. I put the series away until 2014, after I started self-publishing. After discarding the first book but keeping the characters, I eventually published three new books about them: Seasons’ Beginnings, Scattered Seasons, and Chaos Season. There will be two more books in the series, which should be complete next year. Hopefully, the love it gets will be equal to the love I put in it.

Visit Sandra at her blog.
Pick up her latest release, Chaos Season, at Amazon, iTunes, and Barnes and Noble

Ninja News

This Wednesday, the voting opens to decide the genre of this year’s Insecure Writer’s Support Group Anthology Contest! Be watching for the IWSG Newsletter on Wednesday. Voting will be open through July 9.

The MST3K Reunion show is Tuesday, July 28! You don’t want to miss this monumental event. (And if you do have to miss it, there will be an encore show on July 12.)

New release:
Plop Pea Pop by Pat Hatt
Find it on Amazon

Releases Tuesday, July 28:
Self-Help 101 or: How to Survive a Bombardment With Minimal Injury by L. G Keltner
Fine it on Amazon, Amazon UK, Smashwords, Barnes and Noble, and iBooks



Hart Johnson is participating in an awareness campaign this month – twenty-two pushups a day for the twenty-two veterans who commit suicide every day. She nominated me to join the group, spreading awareness online while doing the pushups. Since I am also supposed to nominate someone, I’m choosing Chemist Ken. (Who looks like he could manage the pushups – I don’t want to kill anyone.)

July Movie Preview

Here are the upcoming theatrical releases for July! As always, descriptions courtesy of the IMDB. Snark provided by me.

1 –

The BFG
A girl named Sophie encounters the Big Friendly Giant who, despite his intimidating appearance, turns out to be a kindhearted soul who is considered an outcast by the other giants because, unlike them, he refuses to eat children.
Director: Steven Spielberg
Stars: Rebecca Hall, Mark Rylance, Bill Hader, Jemaine Clement
Is it just me, or do you see something other than the word friendly in BFG…?

The Legend of Tarzan
Tarzan, having acclimated to life in London, is called back to his former home in the jungle to investigate the activities at a mining encampment.
Director: David Yates
Stars: Margot Robbie, Alexander Skarsgård, Ella Purnell, Samuel L. Jackson
Four out of five mountain gorillas recommend this movie.





8 –

The Secret Life of Pets
Taking place in a Manhattan apartment building, Max's life as a favorite pet is turned upside down, when his owner brings home a sloppy mongrel named Duke. They have to put their quarrels behind when they find out that an adorable white bunny named Snowball is building an army of lost pets determined to take revenge
Directors: Chris Renaud | Yarrow Cheney
Stars: Jenny Slate, Kevin Hart, Ellie Kemper, Albert Brooks
It’s no secret – they raid the fridge, drink your beer, and watch NetFlix all day long.



15 –

Ghostbusters
30 years after Ghostbusters took the world by storm, the beloved franchise makes its long-awaited return. Director Paul Feig brings his fresh take to the supernatural comedy, joined by some of the funniest actors working today.
Director: Paul Feig
Stars: Melissa McCarthy, Kristen Wiig, Kate McKinnon, Leslie Jones
Another unnecessary remake, the trailer looks awful, McCarthy is in it – need I say more?



22 –

Star Trek Beyond
The USS Enterprise crew explores the furthest reaches of uncharted space, where they encounter a mysterious new enemy who puts them and everything the Federation stands for to the test.
Director: Justin Lin
Stars: Idris Elba, Zoe Saldana, Chris Pine, Sofia Boutella
This big budget science fiction film will make up for ID: Resurgence!

Ice Age: Collision Course
Scrat's epic pursuit of his elusive acorn catapults him outside of Earth, where he accidentally sets off a series of cosmic events that transform and threaten the planet. To save themselves from peril, Manny, Sid, Diego, and the rest of the herd leave their home and embark on a quest...
Directors: Mike Thurmeier | Galen T. Chu
Stars: Adam Devine, Jennifer Lopez, Melissa Rauch, Simon Pegg
Since the last one wasn’t very good, I’d say the whole series is on a collision course…



29 –

Jason Bourne
Jason Bourne, now remembering who he truly is, tries to uncover hidden truths about his past.
Director: Paul Greengrass
Stars: Alicia Vikander, Matt Damon, Julia Stiles, Tommy Lee Jones
Bourne returns to kick ass again, and there was much rejoicing…

Anyone else throw money at ID Resurgence? What made you a paperback writer? Going to MST3K Reunion Show? Ready to vote for the IWSG Anthology Contest? And what movies catch your eye for July?

Since next Monday is the Fourth of July in the States, I will be completely offline all day! Catch you Wednesday for IWSG post day.

RiffTrax Live – Santa and Ice Cream Bunny Nightmare! Plus Caroling Tips from LG Keltner, Ex Machina Review, Question of the Month, and Ninja News

Today L.G. Keltner gives us some snarky caroling tips, but first…

RiffTrax: Live – Santa and the Ice Cream Bunny

If you could project all the random thoughts inside a mental facility onto a screen, you’d come up with Santa and the Ice Cream Bunny.

The story has so little substance that they had to insert a story (told by Santa to the kids) of Jack and the Beanstalk into the middle of the film. It was really bad, but ironically better than the actual movie.

The film was so short, they had to insert THREE shorts to riff before it began. (The third one was hilarious.)

Overall, Santa and the Ice Cream Bunny was the most I’ve laughed at a movie in a very long time. Probably one of RiffTrax’s best! And it just might rival Manos: Hands of Fate for the worst film ever made…

There is an encore showing – go HERE to see if it’s playing in a theater near you.

Some pre-show screenshots:

Caroling Tips from Author L.G. Keltner

Thanks for hosting me, Alex! It’s an honor to be here.

Some people love Christmas caroling. Others not so much. The world should be grateful that I don’t take part in this tradition, because my voice is terrible.

For those of you who are going to be caroling this holiday season, I have a few tips for making the experience an enjoyable one.

Tip #1: If you don’t like to sing, haul a portable sound system with you. Put “Carol of the Bells” by Trans-Siberian Orchestra on repeat. It rocks, and there’s no singing involved.

Tip #2: Bring a kazoo. No one can resist the charm of a plastic kazoo, and they’re fun to play. Plus they come in pretty colors.

Tip #3: Bring a drum and do a freestyle solo during “The Little Drummer Boy.”

Tip #4: Wear an ugly 3D Christmas sweater. Believe me, such things exist, and they’ll grab attention.

Tip #5: Make up funny lyrics in your head. Just don’t sing them aloud unless you like living on the wild side. That might get you into trouble.

Now enjoy an excerpt from Self-Help 101 or: How I Learned to Take Over the World Through Tolerating My Family.
* * *
I finally pulled away, gulping air as I tried to muster a cool response. “I had to shut you up. I couldn’t risk you saying that it was a mistake, because then my whole wanting-my-first-kiss-to-be-something-the-other-person-wanted thing would’ve been ruined . . . then, um, I would have had to push you in a snowdrift.”
“So you kissed me for my own good?” Seth asked breathlessly.
I nodded.
“That was considerate of you.”
* * *

Find Self-Help 101 at Amazon, Amazon UK, Barnes and Noble, Kobo, Smashwords, Createspace, and Goodreads
She’s also hosting a giveaway – visit her blog to enter.

Movie Review

Ex Machina
A young programmer is chosen to participate in a test with a female A.I. built by an eccentric millionaire.
It’s not action science fiction – this is a thought-provoking flick. But it’s so fascinating that you won’t be bored. At all.
This film poses the big questions about self-awareness versus clever and manipulative programming. It’s a little unsettling but not enough to make you stop watching.
Everyone is excellent in their role. Domhnall Gleeson (Bill Weasely in Harry Potter) is the star and Oscar Isaac plays Nathan, the eccentric. Alicia Vikander was scary perfect in the role of Eva, the A.I.
If you’re a patient viewer and can stand a quiet, thought-provoking film, you will find this movie fascinating.
Definitely recommended.

Ninja News

Thanks again to all participants and co-hosts for a successful Insecure Writer’s Support Group post day.

I do my best to get to as many participants as possible, but I know I can’t visit everyone. (One of the reasons I have new co-hosts every month.) I also try to visit my blogger buddies not involved in IWSG. Altogether, I visit about two hundred blogs on IWSG Wednesday. I visit a few more participants on Thursday and Friday, but I’ll be the first to admit, by that point I am beat.
So if you don’t see me for your regular posting those days, please forgive me.

Elizabeth at Liz’s Random Ponderings is hosting a blogfest – the Christmas Joy Blog Hop – on December 14.
Join us!

Just Released:

Fright Before Christmas: 13 Tales of Holiday Horrors
Featuring stories by Medeia Sharif and Laura Pauling
Find it on Amazon

The Art of Losing: A Thinkerbeat Anthology
Featuring a story by Patsy Collins
Find it on Amazon

Question of the Month

Hosted by Michael at A Life Examined.

Which one social convention would you get rid of? 

I’d like to get rid of the trending political correctness to the extreme and absurd.

At this rate, all jokes will soon be considered taboo. People are way too sensitive. Just stating a difference of opinion is perceived as hateful.

Folks, it’s all right to agree to disagree if at the end of the day, we still respect the other person. We all have different morals, values, standards, and opinions, and that’s all right.

What’s your best caroling tip? Enjoy the IWSG last week? Have you seen Ex Machina? Joining us for the bloghop? What social convention would you get rid of? And did you see Santa and the Ice Cream Bunny last week? And if not, do you want to see RiffTrax take on one of the worst films ever…?

I'll be off the grid from Thursday through the weekend this week. My last post of the year will be next Monday – stop by for some Christmas and geeky fun!

Latest X-Men: Days of Future Past and The Hobbit Trailers! Plus November Movie Preview, Horror Story Trivia, and the Ninja News

Latest Movie Trailers

Just released - X-Men: Days of Future Past trailer - and it is really awesome!



Coming May 23, 2014. And just look at the cast: Hugh Jackman, Michael Fassbender, Patrick Stewart, Ian McKellen, James McAvoy, Jennifer Lawrence, Nicholas Hoult, Anna Paquin, Shawn Ashmore, Ellen Page, Peter Dinklage, Halle Berry, Omar Sy, and Lucas Till.

And in case you missed this one a couple weeks ago – The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug



Coming December 13!

November Movies

Here are the upcoming movies for November! As always, descriptions courtesy of the IMDB. Snarky comments by me.

1 –

Ender’s Game
The International Military seek out a leader who can save the human race from an alien attack. Ender Wiggin, a brilliant young mind, is recruited and trained to lead his fellow soldiers into a battle that will determine the future of Earth.
Director: Gavin Hood
Stars: Harrison Ford, Asa Butterfield, Hailee Steinfeld, Abigail Breslin
I’ve read the book – curious to see how much they changed the ending…


8 –

Thor: The Dark World
Faced with an enemy that even Odin and Asgard cannot withstand, Thor must embark on his most perilous and personal journey yet, one that will reunite him with Jane Foster and force him to sacrifice everything to save us all.
Director: Alan Taylor
Stars: Chris Hemsworth, Natalie Portman, Tom Hiddleston, Stellan Skarsgård
THE movie to see in November!! Looks awesome. And already scoring great reviews at Rotten Tomatoes.

15 –

The Wolf of Wall Street
Based on the true story of Jordan Belfort, from his rise to a wealthy stockbroker living the high life to his fall involving crime, corruption and the federal government.
Director: Martin Scorsese
Stars: Leonardo DiCaprio, P.J. Byrne, Jon Favreau, Spike Jonze
Not the type of movie I see in theaters, but it does look quirky.

The Book Thief
While subjected to the horrors of WWII Germany, young Liesel finds solace by stealing books and sharing them with others. Under the stairs in her home, a Jewish refuge is being sheltered by her adoptive parents.
Director: Brian Percival
Stars: Sophie Nélisse, Geoffrey Rush, Emily Watson, Ben Schnetzer
Based on the book. Before it was stolen…


22 –

The Hunger Games: Catching Fire
Katniss Everdeen and Peeta Mellark become targets of the Capitol after their victory in the 74th Hunger Games sparks a rebellion in the Districts of Panem.
Director: Francis Lawrence
Stars: Jennifer Lawrence, Josh Hutcherson, Liam Hemsworth, Philip Seymour Hoffman
I don’t believe the box office will suffer if I just skip this one…


29 –

Frozen 
Fearless optimist Anna teams up with Kristoff in an epic journey, encountering Everest-like conditions, and a hilarious snowman named Olaf in a race to find Anna's sister Elsa, whose icy powers have trapped the kingdom in eternal winter.
Directors: Chris Buck | Jennifer Lee
Stars: Kristen Bell, Josh Gad, Idina Menzel, Alan Tudyk
So epic, I’d never heard of it until now… But what else are you going to take the kids to see after Thanksgiving?

Ninja News

Madeline Mora-Summonte just released a book - The People We Used To Be. The stories in this flash fiction collection are like day trips - brief, illuminating journeys - across the landscape of the human condition. Congratulations, Madeline!

L.G. Keltner carved one wicked dragon pumkin!!

Horror Story Trivia

Name the author…

1 – The Exorcist 1971

2 – Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde 1886

3 – The Dark Tower 1938

4 – The Anubis Gates 1983

5 – At the Mountain of Madness 1931

Excited about the next X-Men and Hobbit movies? Any movies you plan to see in November? Think LG’s pumpkin is cool? And can you name any of the authors…?

And now scroll all the way to the bottom - my name in lights, courtesy of the awesome Jeremy Hawkins!