Michael Offutt on Slipstream, Dyslexia, and Goatzilla

I have a really cool guest for you today!

First, A quick reminder that the A to Z Challenge Reflections Post is this coming Monday. Post your thoughts on the Challenge and then visit the main blog or any of the hosts and enter the link to your post in the Linky sign up.

My guest today is author Michael Offutt. His first book, Slipstream, just came out last month – and those of us who are authors remember how exciting it is with that very first book! Michael would like to share with you some of his writing rules and a giveaway he is hosting. Take it away, Michael!

Here are the seven rules I use when writing science-fiction:

1) Select a title that has already been done twenty times so that when people Google it, they will find old movies starring Mark Hamill and Anthony Hopkins. In this way you at least get the secondary traffic from people who have low standards.

2) Embrace your dyslexia. This is how you get some really cool alien names.

3) Use post-modernism in your story. It doesn’t matter if you don’t know what that term means. No one else does either. But use it in your pitch and you’ll come across as smart.

4) Use a teenage male or female lead, an evil scientist, and a monster.

5) Recycle ideas that people find familiar. Instead of Godzilla, create Goatzilla—a 200-foot tall goat with radioactive breath who buries Puerto Vallarta under its own droppings. People will think you’re a genius.

6) Solicit good advice from people you know personally, but who really could care less about what you do. After querying 40 times and receiving 40 rejections from agents, it’s helpful to get told, “I think the key to publishing is getting an agent. Have you tried that?”

7) Solicit beta readers from a pool of people who would rather read OK Cupid and Facebook than read a book. These are perfect because they are looking for romance and boy are they ever gonna be surprised by your book. You can write love better than anyone.

And that my friends, is advice you can take to heart. But aside from my snark, you are wonderful. Never forget that. Never stop dreaming.

I have a contest for the release of my book, entitled SLIPSTREAM. I will pick one random person who comments on this post to win a $5 Amazon Gift Card and a SLIPSTREAM jeweled spider (the same person wins both prizes). The jeweled spider isn’t cheap either. It really sparkles in the sunlight. I hope whoever wins it really likes it. Please make sure that your email is linked to your signature in some way or I cannot contact you to let you know you’ve won.

Rules:

1) Mark my book “To Read” on Goodreads.

2) Comment on this post.

3) Tweet this post if you have twitter. You don’t have to sign-up for twitter. It’s the “honor” system.

That’s it. I will choose a winner on Saturday, May 19th. And thank you, Mr. Cavanaugh for having me on your fine blog.

You can find Michael’s book on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, and Goodreads.

Thanks, Michael! Any questions? Have you embraced your dyslexia? Think you could create a story around Goatzilla? Want to win the gift card and pin? Still recovering from the A to Z Challenge? I intend to step away from my computer and do something wacky this weekend. Well, probably not that wacky. But I saw AVENGERS Friday morning and it was AWESOME! And might head over to Myrtle Beach with the wife...