Wednesday, July 31, 2013

August Movie Preview! Plus Solomon Kane Review, Bambi Meets Godzilla, Ninja News, and Special Announcement

Here are the upcoming movies for August! As always, descriptions courtesy of the IMDB. Snarky comments by me.

2 – 

Europa Report
An international crew of astronauts undertakes a privately funded mission to search for life on Jupiter's fourth largest moon.
Director: Sebastián Cordero
Stars: Christian Camargo, Embeth Davidtz, Michael Nyqvist, Sharlto Copley
Unique found footage film that’s generating some good buzz. I just might be found footage overdone though…

2 Guns
A DEA agent and a naval intelligence officer find themselves on the run after a botched attempt to infiltrate a drug cartel. While fleeing, they learn the secret of their shaky alliance: Neither knew that the other was an undercover agent.
Director: Baltasar Kormákur
Stars: Denzel Washington, Mark Wahlberg, Paula Patton, Bill Paxton
Washington and Wahlberg – could be action-packed fun.

9 –

Elysium
A factory worker takes on a mission to hijack his way onto a man-made space habitat.
Director: Neill Blomkamp
Stars: Matt Damon, Jodie Foster, Sharlto Copley, Alice Braga
From the director of District 9. Not an original idea (Battle Angel Alita anyone?) but I’m hoping it’s as good as the previews.

Planes
Dusty is a cropdusting plane who dreams of competing in a famous aerial race. The problem? He is hopelessly afraid of heights. With the support of his mentor Skipper and a host of new friends, Dusty sets off to make his dreams come true.
Director: Klay Hall
Stars: Val Kilmer, Teri Hatcher, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Carlos Alazraqui
From Disney not Pixar – can you say Cars with wings?

We’re the Millers
A veteran pot dealer creates a fake family as part of his plan to move a huge shipment of weed into the U.S. from Mexico.
Director: Rawson Marshall Thurber
Stars: Jennifer Aniston, Emma Roberts, Jason Sudeikis, Ed Helms
From the creator of Dodgeball, which was actually kind of funny...

Also releasing - Percy Jackson: Sea of Monsters

16 –

Kick Ass 2
The costumed high-school hero Kick-Ass joins with a group of normal citizens who have been inspired to fight crime in costume. Meanwhile, the Red Mist plots an act of revenge that will affect everyone Kick-Ass knows.
Director: Jeff Wadlow
Stars: Chloë Grace Moretz, Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Jim Carrey, Christopher Mintz-Plasse
I’ll admit it – guilty pleasure! And the first one really did kick ass

Also releasing – Paranoia, The Butler, and Jobs

23 –

The World’s End
Five friends who reunite in an attempt to top their epic pub crawl from 20 years earlier unwittingly become humankind's only hope for survival.
Director: Edgar Wright
Stars: Rosamund Pike, Simon Pegg, Martin Freeman, Nick Frost
From the creator of Shaun of the Dead and Hot Fuzz – need I say more?


Also releasing – The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones

Ninja News

Big thanks to my friends who visited C. Lee McKenzie on Monday! Bassan was a challenging character and I hope he shines in the third book.

Need a really good laugh? What if Facebook had existed during WWII? Visit Fran at The Angry Lurker for the hilariaty!

Michael Di Gesu is now offering copyrighting and other services. Congratulations on the business venture, Michael! See his site for details.

Rachel Schieffelbein’s young adult novella, Run For the Roses, was picked up by Swoon Romance for a November release. Congratulations, Rachel!

JW Alden’s science fiction story, Battle Lines, is featured in issue 7 of Plasma Frequency Magazine. Also featured in the issue – Milo James Fowler. Congratulations, guys!

Lynn Kelley announced that on Thursday, August 1, a few of the Emblazon authors (who write for tweens) have scheduled a promo day together and priced some of their eBooks for FREE.

Misha Gericke has put up a list for insane dreamers – sign up, stating what you want to accomplish, and then post your progress the last Friday of the month. See her blog for details.

Bambi Meets Godzilla

This is for my buddy Gary at Klahanie. (Don’t forget the Anti-Blogfest Gary Fest! Short and simple – name three blogfests you’d never participate in. Sign up HERE.)

Enjoy Bambi Meets Godzilla!



Movie Review

Solomon Kane
After waiting years, I finally got to see this film!
A mercenary’s soul is bound for hell as punishment for his deeds, but he seeks redemption by helping an innocent family. Watching it gave me some serious D&D flashbacks. It has that vibe to it and the action was really good.
The acting was also good. James Purefoy was perfect as the lead. It was also nice to see Pete Postlethwaite in one of his last roles.
It’s not an epic film, but they did a lot with a very small budget.
As a Christian, I really dug the message of the film – every soul is redeemable.
Recommended – and after viewing this film, I told my wife that it was much, much better than The Wolverine!

Need a good laugh? (Did you watch Bambi Meets Godzilla?) Ready for some free books or a commitment to a goal? Anyone else see Solomon Kane? And what movies catch your eye for August?

Monday I have a special announcement regarding CassaStorm! Stay tuned…

Monday, July 29, 2013

Blogging Rules and The Wolverine Review! Plus Ninja News, New Covers, Video Game Trivia, and an Interview With Byron’s Son

Today there is a very special interview at the blog of C. Lee McKenzie. Why is it special? It’s Bassan’s first interview! Just ten years old and he’s doing his first interview. Want to know more about Byron’s son? Then visit Lee’s site!

Ninja News

Michael Di Gesu has jumped back into illustrations and he began with a book cover design for Siv Ottem. Today is the beg reveal, so visit Michael’s site this morning!!

The Tree of Life project continues at Sam’s site, with numerous entries from blogger buddies of ours. Comment on each entry to win prizes, including a signed copy of CassaStorm!

Roland Yeomans is offering some amazing prizes for reviews of his audiobooks. The prizes include Thor II cast and Johnny Depp autographs. Visit his blog for details!

Melanie Schulz has an amazing blogfest/anthology!
“I will be hosting a blogfest/contest on September 2, 2013. All the stories entered will be complied into an anthology ebook that will be available on Kindle- all proceeds to go to Operation Purple, a great organization that sends children of our military to summer camp, free of charge. One randomly chosen entry will win a $50.00 amazon gift card, as well as a signed copy of my book, The Newstead Project.”

Cate Masters’ latest, Cinderella Dreams, is now available. Congratulations, Cate!

Michelle Gregory needs your input! “For the next IWSG, I want my writing friends to share the most encouraging thing they've learned about writing. It could also be a favorite writing quote, even if the quote comes from you.” Leave a comment or send her an email by this Wednesday, July 31.

Sarah Allen’s short story collection, Cross-Eyed, is now available – and it’s free! Congratulations, Sarah.


Melanie Schulz also posted one of the nicest reviews of CassaFire last Friday!



Cover Reveals!

Félicité Found by Julia King

Spiders by Doralynn Kennedy

The Wilder Mage by Huntress, aka CD Coffelt And you can also check out the cool book trailer!






How Do You Follow Blogs

Thanks to everyone who voiced their opinion last Wednesday. It seems less people are using GFC to follow now.

However, as I am SO damn close to 1900 GFC followers, it would still be really awesome to hit it!!

As Brandon and Bryan from A Beer For The Shower stated:

“It seems people are following in other ways. But, but... how can I justify my blogger existence if people can't see just how many friends I have???”

Video Game Trivia Answers

1 - What is the best-selling iPhone game? Angry Birds
2 - How many Pokemon films have been made? Sixteen
3 - What’s the highest grossing movie based on a video game? Prince of Persia @ $335 million
4 - What is the longest running video game franchise still being made? Mario, which has spawned over 200 games since 1981

Blogging Rules

There aren’t really any rules, but most of us operate under implied guidelines. When we first start out, most of us don’t have a clue when it comes to blogging etiquette

What I’ve listed are my blog rules – feel free to share yours.

Follow me and I’ll follow you. There are exceptions, but I’ll follow someone who follows me if I can find a link to his blog.

Comment here and I’ll return the comment. Same as above applies. (And I do miss people now and then - sorry!)

I won’t post on days I can’t visit and comment back. I know everyone has their opinion about this one, but if I’m gone for the day or won’t have access to my computer, I don’t post. I won’t ask you to visit me when I can’t visit you. That just feels rude.

If I can’t think of anything worthwhile, I won’t post anything. Doesn’t happen often, but I have skipped posting for that very reason.

I’ll ease back when writing, but I don’t stop posting and visiting. Again, it would just feel wrong.

When I follow a new blog, I give the person two weeks to return the follow and/or comments. If not, then I un-follow. I have too many devoted friends to spend time on someone who doesn’t want to be friends.

If I comment, I’ve read the post. I won’t comment just to say I was here or I was first or anything.

I won’t post just to self-promote. Even September 17 won’t be all about me.

I don’t worry about hits or blog visits. (Everything I’ve read says they are very inaccurate anyway.) I won’t post something just to get hits.

As they say, don’t blog angry. (Or is that don't drive angry?)


And finally, I’ll never forget my beginnings – an unknown blogger and author with no followers.

What are some of your rules?

Movie Review

The Wolverine
This film picks up not long after after X-Men III ends.
Similar to Iron Man III (he’s in the suit, he’s out of the suit) I was frustrated with the ‘he has his powers, he doesn’t have his powers’ aspect. Only this one didn’t get any better.
The storyline just doesn’t hold up, especially by the end. It’s a convoluted mess. There were so many opportunities for Wolverine to kick ass – and they didn’t materialize. I see a movie with Wolverine, I expect him to kick ass as some point.
There was also a relationship with a girl less than half his age that felt creepy. And we’re talking Jackman’s age, not Wolverine’s.
The overall tone was just too dark. It wasn’t really enjoyable. I’ve never read the comics, but I bet Wolverine has a nemesis that would’ve been more interesting.
On the plus side, the Japan setting is cool and the character of Yukio kicks butt.
I walked out of the theater thinking it was at least decent, but the more I thought about it, the less I liked this film.
Not recommended.

Excited about the contests and cool covers? Get any of the trivia right? Anyone else see The Wolverine? And what are some of your blogging rules?

Don’t forget to visit C. Lee McKenzie and Bassan!

Wednesday, July 24, 2013

How Do You Follow Blogs? Plus Sharknado at the Ballgame, Video Game Trivia, and Ninja News

Ninja News

Nothing like scrolling through blog post titles on Feedly and seeing this - We Love Ninja Captain Alex! Thank you so much, Sheena-kay. That really caught me by surprise. I’ll try to live up to your kind words!

The Goodreads giveaway for CassaStorm ended Monday, and when I forwarded the winners to my publisher, I noticed two of my blogger buddies had won a copy - Sarah Ahiers, JA Bennett, and Tony Laplume. Congratulations, guys!

The next posting for the Insecure Writer’s Support Group is in two weeks on August 7! My awesome co-hosts will be M. Pax, Karen Walker, and Melissa Maygrove.

Don’t forget the Anti-Blogfest Gary Fest! Short and simple – name three blogfests you’d never participate in. Sign up HERE.



Sharknado Invades Baseball!

It’s everywhere, including the President’s Race! For the first part, keep your eyes on the big screen until the action moves into view.



How Are You Blog Following Now?

How do most of you follow blogs? Has it changed since the death of Google Reader?

I’ve noticed a slowdown in followers via Google Friends Connect this summer. I have that option, plus Feedly, Bloglovin’, Linky Followers, and email in my sidebar. (My blogger profile isn’t linked to my Google+ profile, or I’d have that option in place as well.)

I’m wondering if people aren’t just skipping GFC now? I have several bloggers I follow that way but pulling up their profile reveals they’ve never followed me through GFC. They comment here all the time though, so they're following me somehow.

If the blogger has GFC, I still click to follow, and then go add their link to my Feedly Reader.

Are you guys still using GFC? Using something else instead?

Video Game News and Trivia!

Video games Need for Speed, Assassin’s Creed, Warcraft, and Angry Birds are all coming soon to the big screen – films are in the works.

And on that note, here’s some video game trivia for you:

1 - What is the best-selling iPhone game?

2 - How many Pokemon films have been made?

3 - What’s the highest grossing movie based on a video game?

4 - What is the longest running video game franchise still being made?

Ready for the IWSG and Anti-Blogfest next month? Surprised by the Sharknado craze? Know any of the trivia? And how do you follow blogs?

Monday, July 22, 2013

Announcing the Anti-Blogfest Gary Fest! Plus Ninja and Cassa News, The Bay Movie Review, and Monster Movie Trivia Answers

Ninja News

Milo James Fowler has stories in TWO publications this week – Big Bad Anthology and Bards and Sages Quarterly. Congratulations, Milo!

My blogger buddy Jeremy Hawkins just released four art books in the “It’s Time” series! Congratulations, Jeremy. He will be touring next month, so expect a visit from the Retro Art Master in August.

Rachel Morgan has several short stories in the textbooks Grade 7, 8 and 9 Core Readers for English First Additional Language. Congratulations, Rachel!

At lot of cool news came out of Comic Con this past weekend, including the fact that Zack Snyder will direct the next Superman-Batman movie. Yes, both superheroes in one film! Fans were also treated to a Godzilla experience similar to a ride at Universal Studios. And the metal band Metallica was even there for a panel!

Cassa Updates

Charity Bradford posted her early review of CassaStorm on her blog last week, with high praises for the world building and science elements. That blows my mind, because those areas are not my strong suit. (Although I am currently reading a book that glosses over those elements more than I do.) I guess Byron isn’t the only one who has grown and changed over the years.

CassaStorm is also on the Goodreads list for Can’t Wait Sci Fi Fantasy of 2013. It won’t take many more votes to get it into the top ten, so if you’d like to add your vote, I would appreciate it!

Monster Movie Trivia Answers!



1 – What was the monster in Brotherhood of the Wolf? A lion
2 – How many times have Godzilla and Gamera fought? None
3 – DeForest Kelley fought giant rabbits in what film? Night of the Lepus
4 – Which X-Men cast member starred in Deep Rising? Famke Janssen
5 – What year was the original King Kong released? 1933
6 – What was the giant creature in Lake Placid? A crocodile
7 – In Godzilla vs. the Thing, what was the Thing? Mothra

Movie Review

The Bay
Written and directed by Barry Levinson, this movie chronicles an ecological disaster in a small Maryland town which was covered up by the government.
An entry in the ‘found footage’ genre, this one is unique in how it handles the footage, piecing together views from dozens of cameras to reveal what happened one fateful Fourth of July. Something has infected the water – a combination of pollution, poultry farm runoff, and an unknown entity – and people are dying. The movie follows numerous characters, most notably a college student as a junior reporter for the local news.
What makes this film effectively creepy is the realism. What is killing the people is a real threat that kills fish. The possibility that in the right toxic soup it could kill people is disturbing.
It’s rated R and there is gore, but it’s not sensationalized.
Not for everyone, this movie will stay with you for a while.

The Anti-Blogfest to end all Blogfests!

Announcing the "Anti-Blogfest Gary Fest" on August 12, a blog hop in honor of Mr. anti-blog hop himself, Gary at Klahanie.

Hosted by Mark “Madman” Koopmans, Ninja Captain Alex J. Cavanaugh, “Life is Good” Tina, Rockin’ Robyn Engel and Morgan “The Morg” Shamy.

The rules are *very* simple.

Create the titles of three PG-13 rated blogfests you would never join - and then add a descriptive sentence or two. That's it!

For example, I would never sign up for the:

Cheesecake & Cauliflower Bloghop - "where dinner and dessert is mixed in one dish."

OR the

Blocked up Toilet Blogfest - "where crap happens."

OR even the

Alphapet Zoo-mbie Bloghop - "where cuddly undead toys learn how to spell."

Sign up below!




Can you see growth in your writing? Have you seen The Bay? Get the movie trivia correct? (Joshua nailed it!) Can you vote for CassaStorm? And who’s in for some anti-blogfests?

Wednesday, July 17, 2013

Sharknado Play-by-Play! Plus Ninja News and Monster Movie Trivia

Ninja News

Talli Roland signed a two-book deal with Amazon Publishing. They will re-publish The Pollyanna Plan with a new cover and release The No-Kids Club spring of 2014. Congratulations, Talli!

Taking Time and Other Science Fiction Stories by Ellie Garratt

Available now!

Science fiction stories of time and space...

Find the book at Amazon US, Amazon UK, and Goodreads.

Cassa News

Don’t forget to enter the giveaway for CassaStorm on Goodreads. Open to the USA, Canada. AND Mexico!

Thanks to those of you who visited Jo Murphy’s feature on me this past Monday. I was stunned to discover she was a fan of my books before we ever met in the blogging world! Thanks again, Jo.

And I forgot to mention this in my review of Pacific Rim on Monday. There is a scene where Raleigh is telling Mako about the mental connection between the pilots and that the worst part is the silence when that person isn’t in your head anymore. Yes, CassaStar definitely entered my mind at that point!

Sharknado Play-by-Play

Yes, it was another SyFy Craptastic epic. We won’t even begin to dissect the implausibility of sharks surviving out of water in a storm and then falling to earth with a desire to eat everyone in sight. Just pretend you have the IQ of a carrot and enjoy.

9:01 Sharknado title appears and blows off screen. I’m guessing this won’t be the only thing that blows.

9:04 There are so many sharks in the water, you could literally walk across the ocean.

9:05 The captain of a shark fishing boat is killed. Lucky bastard doesn’t have to watch any more of Sharknado.

9:08 Ian Ziering, post Beverly Hills 90210, shows up. Don’t judge – dude has to eat.

9:15 Girl hands over sarong for tourniquet on man with deep cuts. Hello? The guy behind you is missing a leg and you still have on your bikini!

9:24 Sunny day – hurricane – sunny day – hurricane. Apparently the continuity guy was eaten by a shark.

9:32 When is Sharktopus going to make a cameo?

9:40 George the lovable drunk is eaten by shark. An hour later, the shark was pulled over and issued a DWI.

9:43 Sharks are popping out of the storm drain like a giant Pez dispenser!

9:51 Somewhere Bruce the shark is watching this and laughing his ass off.

9:53 The house is flooded up to the second floor but the road is clear. (Remember folks, the continuity guy is dead.)

9:54 If you only see one film where sharks attack a Beverly Hills home – don’t see this one.

10:05 Man says he came to LA to be an actor. Maybe one day my friend. Maybe one day…

10:16 Car blows up after shark attack. Shark terrorists?

10:21 Special effects time. It’s a tornado. With sharks. Crap, now they aren’t even trying…

10:30 I need to get ready for bed. I don’t think I’ll miss any critical plot twists though.

10:50 A shark just gave birth to Ian Ziering in what can only be described as the worst Discovery Channel special ever.

10:55 They blow up the final Sharknado with explosives. Shame someone didn’t do that to film itself.

While watching this movie, I started thinking of other films they could do. (Obviously I wasn’t the only one, as a few of these have appeared online during the past week.) See if you can guess the disaster – and feel free to add your own:

Sharkpocalypse
Sharkquake
Sharkano
TSharknami
Sharphoon
Sharktastrophe
Sharkzard

Monster Movie Trivia!

How well do you know your monster movies?

1 – What was the monster in Brotherhood of the Wolf?

2 – How many times have Godzilla and Gamera fought?

3 – DeForest Kelley fought giant rabbits in what film?

4 – Which X-Men cast member starred in Deep Rising?

5 – What year was the original King Kong released?

6 – What was the giant creature in Lake Placid?

7 – In Godzilla vs. the Thing, what was the Thing?

Answers on Monday!

And I have to end with this from Jo Blo because it’s awesome!!!!Can't wait for the movie next year.

Have you picked up Ellie’s book? Did anyone else suffer through Sharknado? Know the other shark disasters or have one of your own? Seeing a movie this weekend? Ready for Godzilla next year? And know any trivia answers?

Monday, July 15, 2013

Optical Osmosis and Snark, Pacific Rim Review, Cassa News, and Major Ninja News!

I am being highlighted by Jo over at The Murphey Saga today, and I’m a bit nervous because I have NO IDEA what she’s going to say! Visit her today and hope we are both pleasantly surprised.

Optical Osmosis

Today I welcome long-time friend and critique partner, Jeffrey Beesler. His third book, Optical Osmosis, is out now, and he’s here to tell you about it. And snark. You’ll see!

Hey, Alex! Thanks for having me on the blog today. It’s been a sizzling summer so far for me, both in terms of the weather and in writing. I’m already having a much better July than last year, and I think that’s because I just released Optical Osmosis, my dark sci-fi, available at the links listed below as well as the Apple Store, which I always have a hard time finding a link for.

You might think that in a dark sci-fi story, there might not be any room for humor, or snark. Not so! I have a character, Serenity Fleace, a retired psychic who happens to be friends with the main character, Greg Gnops. Serenity won’t hold her tongue back. For instance, during a dinner scene, Serenity gets into full-on snark attack mode with the story’s antagonist, Flint Kyles, calling him a pathetic little man. When Flint claims he’s not little, Serenity says his argument would probably be a truthful statement in any situation not requiring a bed.

There’s another scene involving Serenity that might not be quite so snarky, but is still my favorite involving her. When Greg arrives at her door to check on her, she’s going through a beauty regiment that includes a facial. Naturally, he points out that he didn’t think of her as the kind of woman who was into her looks. She answers this by saying she won a beauty prize pack by accidentally dialing a radio station holding a contest, rather than her intended number. Silly Serenity.

I don’t know if it would be fair of me to say Serenity’s among my favorite characters from the book. I guess even the author can have a personal bias as a reader of the work, too. I do think she’s quite memorable, though. I certainly hope you get the chance to meet her in Optical Osmosis!

Find Jeffrey here - Blog, Twitter, and Facebook

Purchase Optical Osmosis: Amazon, Barnes and Noble, and Smashwords

Cover Reveals

Cloaked in Fur by TF Walsh
Available August 5, 2013 from Crimson Romance

As a moonwulf, Daciana never expected to fall in love with a human. Hell, she never imagined that she’d abandon her pack, endanger everyone around her, and break the worst rule possible. But she did…

Add to Goodreads HERE

Courage (Mark of Nexus #2) by Carrie Butler
Available October 15, 2013

Rena Collins never thought she’d long for the past—back when affection from Wallace, her freakishly strong boyfriend, was the most dangerous aspect of her life. But now that the human-altering organization known as ERA has gone on the offensive, nothing is safe. Her bloodline is exposed, her relationships torn apart, and just when it seems like things can’t get any worse, ERA ups the ante…

Add to Goodreads HERE

Ninja News

Sean McLachlan’s book, The Quintessence of Absence, is now free! See his site for details.

Jade Hart had an exciting announcement – “Black Firefly have opened their doors to all authors--self-published veterans or brand new--to help with Editing, Cover Art, Formatting, Proofreading, Marketing, Promotion, even Beta Reading. We can do it all, or just pick and choose what services you need.”

Writers4Writers is today and we are supporting Brinda Berry and Catherine Stine.

Hildie McQueen’s latest, Big Sky Blue, is available today. Congratulations, Hildie!


Patsy Collins has a story, Swept Away, in the anthology Came as Me, Left as We. And she was celebrating it on her anniversary, a real life ‘came as me, left as we’ – how awesome is that?

Available now - Christine Rains’ next installment in the 13th Floor Series, The Ghost!

Chiharo Black lives with six supernatural tenants in a haunted building's mysterious thirteenth floor. Of course, no one knows she's there except the cats. Being a ghost can be a bit frustrating and lonely, but it isn't as bad as her mother made it out to be…

And Thursday night I suffered through most of SyFy’s Sharknado just for you!! Expect a play-by-play similar to the one for Sharktopus on Wednesday. Bring popcorn.

Cassa News!!!

CassaStorm now has several awesome reviews on Goodreads, including an amazing review from Nancy S. Thompson and a really special review from Charity Bradford. Thank you, ladies!!!

Melanie Schulz had the most unique review of CassaStar on her site, and it ended with this: “Alex- all I’ve got to say is you better be a hell of a guitar player, because your writing skills blew me away.” Crap, I’m in trouble – I’m a mediocre guitar player at best!!!

Movie Review

Pacific Rim
Wow! It’s like an anime brought to life.
It’s del Toro, so it’s quirky. Certainly not a perfect movie, although at times it was perfectly giddy.
It took a while to get into the flow of the film. But around the halfway point, and especially when the robots and monsters brawl, the movie turns jaw-dropping. (The special effects are out of this world.) By the end I was invested in the characters to the point I even got misty-eyed. (Yes, I cry over monster movies – don’t you?)
The cast is great, especially Idris Elba and Charlie Day. And Ron Perlman!
For the ladies, there is a strong female lead. Rinko Kikuchi’s character is smart and tough.
And for the guys, this film will bring out the twelve year old in you!
Highly recommended.

Any questions for Jeffrey? Picking up Optical Osmosis? What about one of the other new releases? See Pacific Rim or another movie this past weekend? And are you ready for a play-by-play of Sharknado?

Be sure to visit Jo Murphey!